Building trust in bodies and decisions

Oct 28, 2022

The general story about our weight is that we need to control, manage and manipulate it, by controlling, managing and manipulating our bodies. We follow dietary guidelines and plans.


And then we do the same to our kids.


We are afraid of their food choices, because wouldn’t they just choose candy all the time if they could? Wouldn’t we all? The candy and diet industries would like us to think so.


They bombard us with messaging about how we want the candy, how it makes our lives so much better with it - and then the diet industry argues we need to not listen to our body’s interest in candy - we need moderation and restriction.


Who do you trust?

Who do you believe?


Let's play a little. I invite you to answer these questions:

Do you follow a fitness plan?

 A diet or calorie counting?

The RDA (Recommended Dietary Allowance) or recommendations for daily movement? 

Portion size chart? 

Do you lock up or hide the snacks at home?

Do you refuse to bring certain foods into your home?



Why do you do that?

Is it because you trust the source, or is it because you don’t trust yourself or your family?


What would it look like to trust yourself to move?

To eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’ve had enough of whatever it is that your body is calling for?

To not deny yourself what you want only to throw in the towel and then eat all the peanut butter cups in sight (so they will no longer be there tempting you, of course)?


We have thought that trust is earned, but I challenge that trust is given.


We think that we are going to trust based off of past experiences, in which someone has then earned trust.


But it all starts with one giving trust first. Believing without evidence. Experimenting by offering trust, and then looking for the evidence as time passes of how that was the right decision.


So as we think about our kids and trusting them to make the right decisions with food, isn’t it interesting how we say we need to control the food (you know, where the snacks are, how large the portions are) because we see how they haven’t controlled it for themselves in the past.


What about experimenting:

Offering your body trust.

Offering your children trust.

Trust that they will listen to what THEIR bodies need. That they will LEARN. And yes, that they will mess up along the way.


We all do.


When we look to external authorities to determine what is right for our bodies, we lose control over our own. Because we lose trust.


I want you to think about this:


How can I trust my body today?


How can I listen to what my body needs, and provide it?


How can I offer trust to my child?

Check out the Family in Focus with Wendy Schofer, MD Podcast!

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